When you have shitty people in your life, birthdays suck.  You get phone calls from people, and you know the only reason they called is because they feel obligated to do so and the entire time you are on the phone with them, they act like their arm is twisted behind their back.  Douchebags.  You know what else sucks?  While I was on the phone with one of these douchebags, I missed the best call I would have had yesterday…the one from Brandon still in the Middle East.  I haven’t talked to him on the phone since he went over there and I missed the call because some douchebag just called so they can go on thinking they are a good person.  *sigh* 

Today is a GORGEOUS day here.  It’s warm enough to open all the windows and the sky is completely clear.  I sat in the dining room with Lukas for like an hour feeding him his breakfast and eating mine and just enjoying the day.  I like having breakfast with that baby.  He’s a good companion.  He’s easy to be with, he doesn’t make me do all the work because our relationship is simple.  It’s not like a marriage or something..it just works (for now).  But I hope he grows up to be the kind of person that can appreciate those around him and can want to be with them "just because", and he won’t make them do all the work in that relationship to keep it alive.  It hurts to let relationships just kind of die and so many people don’t even realize what’s happening until it’s dead.  Shame.  Friendships, relationships, families, marriages….they all die if new breath isn’t puffed in there every once in a while..and you know what?  I’m tired of being the only one conscious of that in a LOT of my relationships.  What I should do is just drop some dead weight….but I know I can’t do that.  I’m a fucking idiot.    Obviously I’m in a baaaaad mood.  Maybe I need a nap.

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