Ok, so what have you missed?

The plane ride from Seattle to Philadelphia was the longest plane ride of my life.  I will never ride in a plane with a toddler again.  Ever.  Then getting Lukas adjusted to life in a huge house full of breakable things was equally awful.  Jessie’s drive from Seattle to the boonies of Pennsylvania was awful and I’m sure he’ll never want to do that again.  Ever.  Then Jessie had a 3 hour commute EACH WAY to his job.  That means he was spending 6 hours a day in commute.  THAT SUCKS.

Lukas turned two while we were in internet limbo.  Jessie’s parents and brother and sister-in-law and their daughter came and we had a nice little party.  The kids had fun playing and the grown ups had fun catching up and eating ungodly amounts of food.  I made Lukas a dinosaur cake.  It was cute.  He got a million presents as always.

We went into Clarksburg to see friends and family we hadn’t seen in three years.  We brunched with the Canon’s and had a nice visit.  We visited my father and his parents and had a nice and slightly uncomfortable visit.  And then we met up with Aschlie and the rest of a visit was an absolute hoot.  Aschlie and I went to my grandmother’s grave and instead of crying, we told morbid stories and laughed.  My grandma liked to laugh and I think she would have appreciated laughter over tears.  Then we went to the Hussmann’s where I got to hold itty bitty beautiful babies and get slobbered on by Riley.  We had good food, had great company, and felt completely at ease with super nice people.  I was happy for Helen and Mary that their husbands are just super nice guys, to the point of being disarming.

We visited with Aschlie and had great talks and B.S.ing.  It was so nice to talk face to face.  We had breakfast the next morning all together and then said goodbye.  We headed to Morgantown to see Jessie’s brother’s new house.  It is ENORMOUS.  Then the long-assed drive back to the boonies of Pennsylvania.

Somewhere in there we decided that we needed to at least look at a few properties in the area and get an idea of what our budget could afford us.  We found a WONDERFUL realtor and set up a viewing day with three houses.  The first house was dirty and scary.  The second house was on a gorgeous tree-lined street and was fantastic.  The third house needed to be condemned.  We went back to the boonies and talked about looking at other houses.  Then we decided that we actually really liked the second house so we asked our realtor to talk to the listing agent to inquire about it further.  The listing agent said that the price had been reduced recently and they were getting a lot of foot trafic through the house.  We talked about it some more and decided it couldn’t hurt much to put in an offer (after Jessie had about 20 panic attacks).  We put in an offer, got a counter, countered back, and were under contract in one weekend.  It happened really fast.  Then Jessie had another 20 or so freak outs.  We got the place inspected, was told everything is in great shape and after the mortgage company dragged their feet until the last effing minute, we closed.  So yeah, we now own a house.  We looked at three houses before buying one.  The whole process was not as stressful as some people make it out to be.  You sign a zillion papers, you fax a zillion papers, and then you sign a zillion more and then they give you a set of keys.  I’ll be posting pictures later, right now I’m just catching up.  Trust me, I’ll be talking about this place a LOT on the future….and you’re going to read it and like it or else!

On a little side note here, I feel that I should post something funny.  Two nights ago, we went to Home Depot to get a big garbage can for recycling.  It was too big for our car, so we had to readjust everything and ended up having to recline the front passenger seat and setting it in there.  Well with Lukas in the back, there was no place for me to sit besides curling up into a ball and smooshing myself into the space behind the reclined seat.  Our car is tiny and sucks sometimes.  Anyhow, Jessie was talking to me and turned his head to say something and I heard a loud *THUMP* and then him yell, “OUCH!  I just punched myself (I’ll tell you the rest in a second).  Believe it or not, I hear Jessie yell “I just punched myself….” about 3 times a week.  Sometimes he punches himself in various regions of the crotch, and sometimes he punches his chin.  He does this a lot, so it wasn’t a surprise to hear him yell the first part.  It was the second part of this yelp that put me into hysterical laughter only because it was so unexpected.

“I just punched myself in the face with the trash can!”

You tell me where else you would hear that exclamation.  Where?  Who else would say that besides Jessie?

Myspace has been DEAD recently.  Where the hell is everybody??

Summer is officially almost over here in Seattle.  We don’t get those horrendous dog days that WV gets…summer just kind of abruptly stops and it starts getting cold again.  It’s like I blinked and summer was over.  Kinda sucks, but it also means that my favorite season is almost here and that this pain in the butt baby will be out of my body soon!  I can’t wait to meet him, but seriously, I want my body back.  He’s getting really big and more than once I was sure that he had broken a rib by a huge kicking fit.  Little friggin spaz.  Obviously he’s mine and Jessie’s offspring.  He’s already just like us.

My hair is getting really gray.  I started graying lightly when I was 19, but after this sickness and everything, I’ve noticed that the top of my head is really quite gray.  I’ll wait until after the baby is born to color it.  That’s right, I’m coloring it.  I’m vain enough to not want gray hair in my 20s.  Suck it.

I’m sick and tired of Faith Hill and Tim Mcgraw.  I’m not even a country music fan, so why the hell am I being subjected to their pain in the ass goody goody Look At How Happily Married We Are crap?  They need to shut the hell up and make better music.

I’m sick and tired of having leaky breasts.  They started leaking back in month 5.  Nobody says that it starts that early, or that you’re going to spend the next several months waking up wet and sticky because you were sleeping on your side and your breasts were getting a little squeeze from the pressure of your arms.  I want my novelty boobs back.  I liked them better when they were only decoration, tiny as they were.

Third trimester fatigue blows!  I spend most of my time lying down and sleeping!  I always liked that I was an energetic person before.  If there was something I wanted to get done, it got done..and in record time.  Now I’m like a slug…I just lay around all day and wish that I could just have a little bit of energy.  You should see my house.  Not up to my standards of cleanliness at all.  I hope I get this stupid “nesting” thing all the pregnancy books talk about.  It’s apparently a nice burst of energy very close to the day your child is born, and I fully intend to use it to scrub this place down with bleach!  If I don’t get it, I’ll just have to make Jessie babysit one day after I’ve recovered and do it.  I can’t live in these conditions.

That’s it.  I just posted for the hell of it.  Nobody else is doing anything on here, so I wanted to maybe start something.

It has snowed here.  This did not phase either Jessie nor I in the least because it IS late November and that stuff happens, right?  Apparently not in this area.  So it snowed an inch.  ONE INCH, and they canceled school, people were abandoning cars in the middle of busy streets and walking miles to get home for fear of the awful weather.  IT SNOWED ONE FUCKING INCH!  ARE YOU SERIOUS?!!?  Apparently only the idiots in the Seattle area have no idea how to handle an inch of snow.  A local paper was headlining about the “Seattle Blizzard.”  Severe human stupidity, as it turns out, knows no end.

If I have to look at the music video for “Lips of an Angel” by Hinder one more time I am going to combust.  Not only does that song suck major balls, the look on the face of the singer as he is singing is quite a spectacle.   It looks like the guy has been cornholed by a fence post and he thinks yelling like that will make it come out.  That song sucks…seriously.  I fucking hate it.

Another thing about this area and the inch of snow that pisses me off:  I am expecting a package from UPS.  It was supposed to be here Monday.  It got delayed.  It was supposed to arrive Tuesday, but because of the “emergency weather conditions that are out of the control of UPS” it was delayed again.  Same thing happened yesterday (Wednesday).  These “Emergency conditions” must be quite serious.  I mean, holy crap!  A full inch of snow!  We must declare a state of emergency!  These idiots out here all drive Subarus and SUV’s with all-wheel-drive just for looks and they don’t understand that an inch of snow is not going to cause their fucking cars to explode.  They drive 10mph in the rain as it is (which is maddening because HELLO!  This is Seattle, it rains all the damned time!).  I can’t decide if I should be amused over this or completely disgusted at the stupidity of these people. I’m leaning towards disgusted.  REALLY disgusted.  Idiots.

I’m ok though.  Not in a bad mood at all.  I just had to vent a little bit.  As I said before, I’m feeling quite bouncy today.  Just don’t talk to me about how much snow there is outside or I’ll be forced to kill you with my pencil.